ThE pRiCe of PeRFecTiOn
24 March 13:18H Posted by James Ogle MSW, LCSW
As a society, individuals are taught to strive for perfection. Success is often defined as being a top performer at work, having the most friends, or getting along with everyone. This may help explain why Americans idolize sports stars. As the United States is a capitalist society, there can be advantages to striving for perfection including higher-paying positions. Trying to achieve perfection may lead to overconfidence and what some individuals might deem as arrogance.
The truth of the matter is you cannot win a Superbowl, run a company, or achieve great accomplishments without overconfidence. However, there can be negative consequences to overconfidence. Overconfident individuals may perceive they are unique and gain a sense of superiority over others, which can negatively impact social relationships. Furthermore, overconfident people always attempt to achieve perfection which is not possible. As a result, these individuals are often overly critical of themselves and are unable to give themselves credit for their achievements because perfection was not reached. The only validation these individuals can accept is from others. As it turns out, praise from others is not always consistent.
When I work with an individual who strives for perfection, I first help them acknowledge that they are not unique. Though this can be a challenging process at first, people eventually feel relieved when they accept that they are not unique, and no longer feel like they constantly must strive for perfection. Then, I help them shift their focus to performing their best each day. This process allows people to feel good about their accomplishments and to not rely on external validation. When people embrace that perfection is not achievable and they are not unique, then they view other individuals as equal. This allows people to learn from others, gain new insights, and build meaningful relationships. These are advantages of striving to become humble.
Jim Ogle, MSW, LCSW
Jim is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) who earned his Master’s degree in Social Work from Boston College. Having grown up in the North Shore area, Jim brings a familiarity of the community to the practice. He has been with Attention to Wellness for over a year and has over 16 years’ experience working with both adolescents and adults.
Jim has provided treatment in a variety of clinical settings to adolescents, adults, and families experiencing depression, anxiety, conduct issues, and other mood disorders. He brings six years’ experience working in court systems with youth on probation who were at risk of being removed from their home, and their families. Jim also brings experience providing anger management and drug counseling groups within multiple schools. Currently, Jim also works at a high school providing social work services to students who have an Individualized Education Program.
Jim’s approach with both adolescents and adults incorporates techniques from strengths-based, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy/Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (CBT/DBT), Motivational Interviewing, and Structural Family Therapy to help clients identify and eliminate barriers that inhibit them from achieving their goals.
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